10 simple things that make men smile
For most of us, the truly great moments in life are relatively few and far between. You know the ones. You meet the girl of your dreams, you get married, you get the dream job, you get the dream promotion, you buy a great house, your kids are born.
These are life-changing events, but they don't get you through the endless grind of everyday life. Do you know what does? Getting the last parking space in the car park.
Yep, call us trivial and small-minded if you like, but for many men it's the small everyday victories that really make us smile. These aren't the things that make life worth living, but they can make a mundane Monday a whole lot better.
The big things are great when they happen — but it's the small stuff that gets you through the day. Here's a list of the simple things that will put a smile on any man's face, at least until lunchtime.
Telling a great joke
It's not just the joke that will put a smile on your face, it's the fact that telling a good joke well raises you in the estimation of other men.
Joke telling is a skill and many men (and pretty much all women) can't master it. Even if your only audience is the guy in the next cubicle, telling a good joke is a day-brightening experience.
Finding money
It might only be a fiver, but it's a fiver out of the blue. Everything you buy with that fiver is a bonus, so you might as well spend it on the stuff you want rather than stuff you need — sweets, beer or a take-away meal to avoid the domestic drudgery of cooking and washing up.
Finding money is the easiest way to brighten your day. Eyes to the floor!
Delivering the perfect put-down
So the self-important idiot is mouthing off in the pub again. It's during one of his interminable self-serving anecdotes that you hope and pray for a perfect put down to arrive right now, this very second, and not in 10 minutes when the moment has passed.
It rarely happens, but when it does, and you deliver it to the admiration of everyone but the pompous victim, it's a beautiful, beautiful moment.
Winning something
The office Super Rugby sweepstake, a tenner on the dogs, a game of cards, a free burger, a single lap race on Gran Turismo....it can be anything, as long as you win.
We are competitive creatures, and victory is good for us, even if the free burger isn't.
Being right
She comes out with a 'fact'. You dispute it. She is adamant. You agree to refer the decision to a higher authority (usually Wikipedia). You are proved right. You run around the flat, arms aloft, like you've kicked the winning conversion.
Why is it that, as her pretty little face crumples, you are overcome with a feeling of smug satisfaction, and the wonderful realisation that you can bring up this mighty victory for the clear bright light of truth over the thick grey fog of error for at least the next 10 years? Because being right makes us happy.
Spotting a mistake
Making mistakes is horrible. Spotting somebody else's mistakes — and pointing them out of course — is just dandy.
The higher up the ladder of authority the mistake is made, the better it is when you spot it. Spotting a mistake by your boss is more satisfying than spotting one by a fellow pen pusher.
Of course, spotting a mistake by your wife or girlfriend provides the most satisfaction of all, especially in an area (housework, relationships, life, everything!) where she regularly claims perfection.
Bagging a great parking spot...
...or the last parking spot, or the spot that's right outside the office doors, or right next to a car that's far more nick-able than your own.
The public transport equivalent is getting a table to yourself in the carriage next to the buffet car.
Reaching something down from a high shelf...
Or opening a jar, or recovering her lost Word document. In other words, doing the small stuff that proves she needs you around, even if she claims she doesn't.
Spontaneous physicality
Whether it's a quick sprint across a busy road, a quick turn around the block on your housemate's new bike or that classic moment when the kid miskicks the ball in your direction and you control it deftly before volleying it back onto the pitch, proving you've still got it is one way to make your day.
Getting one up
So your annoying colleague's new laptop has three gigs of RAM? Well look at this, your laptop has four. So your mate got an A for his essay, but you got...hmmm, is that an A+?
So your best friend bought the jeans you wanted (and you can't possibly be seen to be copying), but would you believe it, you found a better pair, $10 cheaper, just round the corner.
Getting one up on your fellow man is petty, ridiculous and intensely satisfying.
These are life-changing events, but they don't get you through the endless grind of everyday life. Do you know what does? Getting the last parking space in the car park.
Yep, call us trivial and small-minded if you like, but for many men it's the small everyday victories that really make us smile. These aren't the things that make life worth living, but they can make a mundane Monday a whole lot better.
The big things are great when they happen — but it's the small stuff that gets you through the day. Here's a list of the simple things that will put a smile on any man's face, at least until lunchtime.
Telling a great joke
It's not just the joke that will put a smile on your face, it's the fact that telling a good joke well raises you in the estimation of other men.
Joke telling is a skill and many men (and pretty much all women) can't master it. Even if your only audience is the guy in the next cubicle, telling a good joke is a day-brightening experience.
Finding money
It might only be a fiver, but it's a fiver out of the blue. Everything you buy with that fiver is a bonus, so you might as well spend it on the stuff you want rather than stuff you need — sweets, beer or a take-away meal to avoid the domestic drudgery of cooking and washing up.
Finding money is the easiest way to brighten your day. Eyes to the floor!
Delivering the perfect put-down
So the self-important idiot is mouthing off in the pub again. It's during one of his interminable self-serving anecdotes that you hope and pray for a perfect put down to arrive right now, this very second, and not in 10 minutes when the moment has passed.
It rarely happens, but when it does, and you deliver it to the admiration of everyone but the pompous victim, it's a beautiful, beautiful moment.
Winning something
The office Super Rugby sweepstake, a tenner on the dogs, a game of cards, a free burger, a single lap race on Gran Turismo....it can be anything, as long as you win.
We are competitive creatures, and victory is good for us, even if the free burger isn't.
Being right
She comes out with a 'fact'. You dispute it. She is adamant. You agree to refer the decision to a higher authority (usually Wikipedia). You are proved right. You run around the flat, arms aloft, like you've kicked the winning conversion.
Why is it that, as her pretty little face crumples, you are overcome with a feeling of smug satisfaction, and the wonderful realisation that you can bring up this mighty victory for the clear bright light of truth over the thick grey fog of error for at least the next 10 years? Because being right makes us happy.
Spotting a mistake
Making mistakes is horrible. Spotting somebody else's mistakes — and pointing them out of course — is just dandy.
The higher up the ladder of authority the mistake is made, the better it is when you spot it. Spotting a mistake by your boss is more satisfying than spotting one by a fellow pen pusher.
Of course, spotting a mistake by your wife or girlfriend provides the most satisfaction of all, especially in an area (housework, relationships, life, everything!) where she regularly claims perfection.
Bagging a great parking spot...
...or the last parking spot, or the spot that's right outside the office doors, or right next to a car that's far more nick-able than your own.
The public transport equivalent is getting a table to yourself in the carriage next to the buffet car.
Reaching something down from a high shelf...
Or opening a jar, or recovering her lost Word document. In other words, doing the small stuff that proves she needs you around, even if she claims she doesn't.
Spontaneous physicality
Whether it's a quick sprint across a busy road, a quick turn around the block on your housemate's new bike or that classic moment when the kid miskicks the ball in your direction and you control it deftly before volleying it back onto the pitch, proving you've still got it is one way to make your day.
Getting one up
So your annoying colleague's new laptop has three gigs of RAM? Well look at this, your laptop has four. So your mate got an A for his essay, but you got...hmmm, is that an A+?
So your best friend bought the jeans you wanted (and you can't possibly be seen to be copying), but would you believe it, you found a better pair, $10 cheaper, just round the corner.
Getting one up on your fellow man is petty, ridiculous and intensely satisfying.
No comments:
Post a Comment